Improved communication through ending statements with questions to others

Sometimes in conversation with clients, I notice that the bridges to great communication are not being built by them because they often end statements by just ending them, as if they have run out of information to convey.  If the conversation was a quick one that doesn't need to go further, that's one thing...but what if it's not?  What if there is more to say, or if the other person has not been allowed to speak their mind? At that point, it's up to me to figure a way to continue the conversation.  What would be helpful is for clients to develop the sense of ending their statement with a related question to me, such as "What do you think about (conversation topic)?" or "Has something similar ever happened to you, and how did you handle it?" or something along those lines.  Placing all the responsibility for continuing the conversation on the other person is tough for them, it's got to something that's shared in order for everyone to feel like they are "equally vested" in the communication.

Developing the ability to come up with these sentence bridges is key, and in a related way, knowing how to end a conversation with the implied mutual understanding that "if there is more, we can talk again" is also worthwhile.  After everyone has been able to give their viewpoint, being able to say "Okay for now, let's continue this later" is a nice way to sort of cap that part of the conversation, but allow for the chance of deeper talk later.  Just ending by finishing what YOU have to say and standing there quietly might be misinterpreted by the conversation partner, and in any case puts a new responsibility on them to bridge the gap or else just be done with the talk, perhaps before they are really ready to do so.

Asking for other people's input is normally welcome, and having some "soft" ways of ending the conversation on your part that allows other input right then or in the future gives the people also in the dynamic the chance to have some appropriate closure to the communication.  Envision it as not slamming a door, but rather putting your hand on the doorknob, which non-verbally clues someone else that perhaps the conversation is winding down...but the gentle had allows a few more moments of conversation and will enable them to come back later via speaking or email or text to revisit the conversation and continue things.  Listen to how others do it, or ask people for their ideas on how to perform this skill, and you'll have better conversations and more satisfied co-workers and friends as you develop a tough skill that really elevates you verbally and inter-personally!

Are you "OVER-COMMUNICATING?" Pick the right time and mode of communication

It's terrific if you like your job!  It's even better if you like your job and have ideas about how to work more efficiently, where to find new customers, how to market things, free places to get the word out on the company, possible partners, etc., but when sharing that information, you should consider how you are coming across to co-workers and supervisors.  Basically, picking the "right time and right way" to communicate ideas is crucial, and you want to sort of test out how best to do this as you go along rather than spend many hours putting together an idea email and then sending it to the wrong person or wording it in a less-than-thoughtful way.

First of all, don't think you have to share every idea you have the moment you have it.  If you are new somewhere, give yourself some weeks/months to get to learn the job before you start offering observations on how it could be done differently/better.  That said, there is nothing wrong with keeping a sort of personal journal of things you notice or ideas that come to you, even starting with your first day there...capture those thoughts, write them down, know that you have written them down so you can move on, and have them ready to polish and discuss/send WHEN THE TIME IS RIGHT. It can be tempting, but a meeting called to discuss a certain topic is not the right time to flood the folks around you with your unrefined thoughts on unrelated things, and people won't take kindly to you doing this.

Refining and polishing your ideas and trying to condense them to the essence of what matters is key.  An over-long email will lose the reader, perhaps even before she starts to read it.  Asking someone that you have some rapport with if you can send them some ideas you had is a reasonable request, and they'll probably reply "Yes, sure!"  When that happens, make sure these early emails are about topics that the person can understand (don't fire ideas about marketing to a person that is in human resources, or if you do, make sure you are actually asking them "Who should I send this to in marketing, in your view?"), and that they are not too long and involved and tangential...like I mentioned, refine and polish your thoughts.  Use bullet points, not long paragraphs, to make it easier to read and give a sense of organization when they open the email.

I'm mentioning email because it's a mode of communication that the person can open when the time is right, can come back to if they are interrupted, and they don't have to add the oddity of you watching their reaction to your ideas as they are formulating responses.  Give them the courtesy of letting your ideas percolate a bit before any response is given, they might have deeper reactions after thinking about it for a few days.  If you fire ideas at someone, they might have a hard time processing the various topics, get confused that things are separate ideas are merged when you really have not combined them, and generally lose the thread and specifics of what you are trying to say.  Let them get to know you via the written word, which is easier for the message to ring clearly in.

Perhaps after reading your message, they'll have ideas who else to send the email to: if so, that's excellent!  Or maybe they'll advise you to clean the email up even more or narrow it to one idea or another edit: take their advice to show you are really listening and are an appreciative person.  The ideas that are not being concentrated on are not gone, you can just save them for future use sometime.  Maybe they'll agree to forward it to someone else with their comment like "Hey Jim, take a look at the idea Mark had about advertising...possible way to save money?" and then you'll have to see what the next person has to say.  Whether or not the idea gets used, showing your co-workers that you have an active mind and know how to present your ideas will only pay dividends for you, and you'll lay a foundation for broader success as you go!